It is amazes me how emotions rule my life. In the last year I have gained weight, kept an messy house, and some days barely made it out of bed literally sleeping 18-19 of 24 hours in a day. Working nights has played into this a little, but the overwhelming feeling of loss is what contributes to the majority of my issues. I miss my grandma like crazy, I can't have children and now I am going though "the change" at 32 years old.
One week ago today I made a conscious decision to get rid of some of this weight I have put on over the last two years. I am at the heaviest I have ever been and it just makes things worse for me when my clothes don't fit. Today I weighed in and I am down 6 pounds. I realize some of this is water weight that the cleanse I am doing is getting rid of and so the weight loss will slow down, but for now I feel on track. I even worked out yesterday for the first time in who knows how long.
Even though I can't change the fact my eggs suck and I can't change the fact that my body thinks its older than it is; I can change my life style and eating habits. I can do this. I will do this.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Apparently this is life
The last few months have brought us some new opportunities. Mike started a new job in NE, we are officially moving to NE and a few adoption prospects have come our way. The latest was going to cost us $26,000 which we were not worried about until we talked to the agency. She was pushing to get this money now and said if we didn't do it she had someone set up to do it. We said we would like to meet her before we commit to such a lofty expense and she told us there was no time for that, she needed $3500 now. I mean we wanted to meet on Friday (its Wednesday). I am now thinking what kind of scam are these people running. Although we thought the match seemed pretty good at first we have now backed out due to the pushy nature of the agency rep. I mean this is why we researched our brains out to find a good agency...why can't we get a baby with OUR agency??? And so goes our adoption woes :(
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